I am a self-employed, middle class man. I have recently come to a new place during this pandemic, (the reason behind it, is a long story) leaving behind my profession. It’s frustrating, irritating and depressing to be at home, doing nothing and thinking about future and present, which is taking us nowhere. I am feeling like an alien here.

A few days back, I came across a news where it was aired that one of the leading actor of Bollywood industry has committed suicide and this news was followed by many views and opinions, which are possible under the sky. Certainly, I am affected by that tragic news, was the actor heartbroken? This question came to my mind at once but in the follow up news I came to know that the case was not so. I thought then that these actors are coming from rich class and I still believe so and therefore, they have all the facilities and luxuries available in the world. They can manage everything and can make anything happen for them. But, no, I was mistaken. His death has shaken many beliefs and has forced us to think about every individual around us.

Now after a few days of the tragic news being announced, I feel that the artist in him was an alien in Mumbai. His house was shown on television and we got to know about him as a person and his interests which speaks volume about his tastes and simplicity. It is also informed that he was among the toppers of engineering entrance exam of Delhi University, so his intellect cannot be doubted and the kind of people he was working with, his economic status also cannot be doubted but what can be doubted truly is his emotional immunity. In my view, actor Sushant Singh Rajput was the most energetic and cool actor and yes, now I am talking about is death. The praise which we gave for his films, he deserved it in his social life also. With the charming smile and the boy next door image, Sushant Singh Rajput was a delight on celluloid. Sushant Singh Rajput was different from others. He was hardworking and focused with complete maturity and his commitment was apparent from his track record. His suicide has raised so many questions which I think would not be answered as it’s very difficult to know as to what has shaken his belief in life to the extent that he killed himself. He was full of life then what disastrous had happened which forced him to this extent.

The act of committing suicide has somewhere shaken my belief that success brings everything and therefore, I do not feel that I am an alien now in this new city where I have shifted to. It is always the support system in the family which keeps a person alive and of course, the element of joy has nothing to do with success or failure.  Sushant Singh Rajput was a real human being and a promising actor. We all need to identify with him at some or other point of time. We all leave our roots in search of occupation and he also came from Bihar to Mumbai in search of occupation as an actor. What is left behind, back at home was probably the emotional immunity. Probably he failed to maintain his emotional immunity far away from home.

Come what may, wherever we maybe and whatever the circumstances may be, there is nothing which can’t be undone or repaired or altered. Every problem has solution. We just need to talk about it with our family members, relatives or friends. May it be depression or something else, everything can be handled, if we are together and provide emotional immunity to each other.

“It is easy to make friends and very difficult to maintain lifelong relations with them”, very commonly said but not understood in its true sense by everybody. Either you can have friends or you can have acquaintances, both of them are precious relations. As the saying goes, a friend in need is a friend indeed. So, dear friends, let’s understand what is friendship. Two or more than two persons meeting selflessly and remaining in contact of each other is friendship in broader sense but sometimes it is not possible for them to meet or stay connected but even then the friendship goes on, meaning thereby, friendship is a bond which is not seen but it keeps persons connected and they can call of each other whenever they want to without thinking about the period of non-connectivity they had in past.

In my view the above paragraph, is preface of something I am going to write about friendship. The process starts either automatically or by choice but it is the only relationship which never takes shape by sufferance. Now, let me take you to the ancient period wherein we all have heard about friendship of Lord Krishna and Sudama and of course of Duryodhana and Karan and last but not the least friendship of Arjun and Krishna. Yes, you rightly have reminded yourself of the ancient stories we have heard about all of them. Should I repeat them, no of course not, because the bond of friendship was the unique feature of their characters and has attracted all of us so much that we remember the characters till today. In the Western world we see a different kind of friendship bond. In the Western world people unite because of their hobbies means the photographer would make friend with a photographer and a painter would make friend with a painter, why, because their hobbies bind them with each other and here in the eastern world, as we all are very emotional we make friendship with almost every person we come across but see the difference, it is happening only now a days I mean, only for last few centuries. Earlier, in the ancient eastern world people were uniting because of their hobbies but as industrialisation took place in eastern world the friendship has become orphan mission mistaken by relation of convenience for taking advantage of each other. Such friendships are not bound to last long and they never. So, friends make friends, selflessly and although appears very rude but keep an exit route if you are fallen in a bad friendship. Let me tell you the bond of friendship evolves over the years and it makes you perfect in that relationship only when both the parties think beyond self-interest. Since meaning of stories we have heard so far, only reminds us of bad friendship or relationship with each other amongst friends, now onwards keep in mind that we will make friends to nurture our hobbies and not for business.

According to Psychologists, there are four (4) types of INTELLIGENCE:

1) Intelligence Quotient (IQ)

2) Emotional Quotient (EQ)

3) Social Quotient (SQ)

4) Adversity Quotient (AQ)

1. Intelligence Quotient (IQ):

This is the measure of your comprehension ability”, solve mathematics; memorize things, and recall subject matters.

2. Emotional Quotient (EQ):

This is the measure of your ability to maintain peace with others; keep to time; be responsible; be honest; respect boundaries; be humble, genuine and considerate.

3. Social Quotient (SQ):

This is the measure of your ability to build a network of friends and maintain it over a long period of time.

People that have higher EQ and SQ tend to go farther in life than those with high IQ but low EQ and SQ. Most Schools capitalize in improving IQ level while EQ and SQ are played down.

A Man of high IQ can end up being employed by a Man of high EQ and SQ even though he has an average IQ.

Your EQ represents your character; your SQ represents your charisma. Give in to habits that will improve these three Qs but more especially your EQ and SQ.

EQ and SQ make one manage better than the other.

Please don’t teach Children only to be IQ but also to be EQ and SQ.

Now there is a 4th one: A new paradigm

4. The Adversity Quotient (AQ):

The measure of your ability to go through a rough patch in life and come out without losing your mind.

AQ determines who will give up in face of troubles, who will abandon their family or who will consider suicide.

To Parents.

Expose Children to other areas of life than academic. They should adore manual work (never use work as a form of punishment), sport and art. Develop their EQ, SQ and AQ. They should become multifaceted human beings able to do things independently of the Parents.

Finally, do not prepare the road for the Children.

Prepare the Children for the road.

A citizen has protection of law, this is the most common perception of law, which everybody has.
A member of society comes to think about law only in a situation when either faces some inconvenience or wants to change his/ her routine/ schedule.
Law has evolved out of common sense and rituals. Daily practice of one’s routine generally does not come across thinking about law but change in one’s practice make him/ her think about relevant law.
Superficially we tend to consult lawyers only for defending or attacking and no sooner we find one, we leave everything on that lawyer.
Here, it is very important to note that we also need to know law in order to be doubly sure about advice.
The standard of advice is very important, for example, for consultation on matrimonial law, we need to precisely look for a particular lawyer.
Today the need has arisen when speciality is the most sought-after quality in profession.
Citizen are protected but they are protected only by law enforcing agencies but, in a time, when citizen is feeling helpless in the hands of law enforcing agencies only then they look for appropriate forum for submitting their grievances and Hon’ble courts are the only fora where they can submit their grievances.
To approach to the courts, they need lawyer and lawyer first take information from aggrieved citizen and then prepares a brief of it, means writes the contents to figure out the gist and essential ingredients are incorporated.
It begins with five W and one H.
W= Who, When, Where, Why, What
It is very necessary for a lawyer to remain ready with appropriate law and precedents on the points of determination because their brief is submitted to the court then court calls the other party to defend the accusations.
It is expected that the truth shall prevail but first of all, the litigant should ensure that he/ she is coming to the court with clean hands meaning that no more act befooling anyone, not yourself.
Once the case is presented/ submitted the notices are issued to the defendants and they are expected to submit befitting reply and point of determination are ascertained and both parties adduce evidence to support the claim/ allegation and the decision is given by court by dealing with each point of determination.
The above write up would enlighten all of you in very raw manner about how litigation runs in the country.
In the entire write up the role of lawyer is apparent from both the sides. Now even if one is filing/ suing the other party, the lawyer has a great role and the defendants also need a lawyer because from both the sides, lawyer present the case and before presenting it, prepare the case/ reply.
Lawyers are expected to work reasonably impartial and are also expected to bring truth before the judge and cite the precedents. Precedents are the alike cases decided earlier and contain principles laid down by different courts on important points.
Judges also largely depend upon lawyers because lawyers keep appearing in different cases and at different hierarchy of courts.
Hierarchy of courts means different levels of courts / judges based on their level of experience or number of years of experience.
The important question is when one should indulge in litigation. In my humble opinion, litigation should be the last resort and before initiating litigation, all the efforts should be put in to resolve the dispute first out of court only.
Our courts are already overburdened with thousands of cases and in the already going on litigation also, efforts are made to resolve the cases, then filing new cases should be discouraged.
Let’s come to an experience of avoiding litigation. Once a party sent a notice of recovery to its customers, who after receiving the notice, went to his lawyer, who in turn after talking to his client the real situation, replied that, yes, the party owes certain money and intends to return in certain number of instalments and could not return so far because of financial crunch and sent the reply alongwith first instalment of payment and both the parties were happy.
Concludingly the author, wishes to put it on record that be it litigation or any process of court, we cannot afford to now overload our system of judiciary any more.
The concept should revolve around one rule of thumb that avoid litigation as far as possible and this practice will be very helpful in evolving alternative mode of finding justice like Arbitration, Mediation and Reconciliation.

(Views expressed here are private and personal views of Author who is a practicing lawyer)